Monday, May 25, 2009

The Skyrocketing Cost of Education!

To all ye out-of-work destitute Wall Street bankers: Fear not. Minimal vocational re-education is required for you to join the next big industry .... Education.

Yes, a standard Harvard MBA only costs $175,000, leaving little room for nine-figure professorial salaries. Yes, for some people, a copy of Atlas Shrugged ($8.95) is enough of an eye opener. But the new trend in education caters to those "feeling" style learners who must experience it to learn it ... of course, with copious amounts of hand holding. For them, a few current offerings:

  • Hands-on independent studies on pitfalls of Leveraged Buy Outs of failed businesses:

$50 billion ($19 billion deposit required)
Chrysler.....$12 billion and 100,000 jobs (best value!)
AIG..........$170 billion plus 10% of the value of shares on NYSE
Act now! Inflation pricing starts soon!

  • Popular! New! "Trial-by-fire" Style Finance 101 .... Price: $700 billion
  • Private! Experiential MBA: .... Price: $1.9 Trillion (and counting)
  • Investment Basics: .... Price: $ ("socially priced" at 35% of your net worth)
  • Keynes vs. Friedman vs. Hayek: Fiscal and Monetary Policy: .... Price: $ (1 percent of GDP)
  • Pass-or-Fail Monetary Policy 301: .... Price: $(price determined one generation after you take the class)

  • And the ultimate: On-the-job-training in the White House: .... Price: $ Priceless

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